On to Dartmouth

A week from today Tory and I will leave for Dartmouth. It’s hard to feel like I have my head wrapped around that. 18 years of dad hood and here we are at the end of one road looking at another. It’s an unknown,  a stare into a black box, a wondering of what is around the corner. But I don’t have an overwhelming sense of sadness. There is a weight there of course – l will really miss having him here every day. But mostly I’m excited for him. For the next phase of his life. To watch in wonder at where he goes next. 

From the earliest days I’ve taken great joy over watching him advance and learn and grow. From rolling over and first steps, to learning to ski, to holding conversations with adults. Watching him grow might be the greatest joy I could have imagined. Watching him take the next steps on to college is a continuation of that. I have loved watching both my kids surpass me in almost every area of life and I can only expect that will continue. 

I don’t define myself very much around being a father. Or being a dad. I don’t have a ton of advice to dole out. But I think I did a good job so far. He’s a good kid. You’re a good kid Tory. Thanks for making it easy to raise you.

There are things I know I didn’t prepare him for. Dartmouth, ha! I haven’t the faintest idea on how to prepare him for east coast Ivy. Other than the same things I’ve guided him on growing up in the privileged bubble of Park City. He’ll teach me a thing or ten about all that. 

I do look forward to the drive we’ll be taking. 3 or 4 days on the road, time to talk, time to say the last things I can say before he walks through that door. To listen to his words. And I look forward to seeing him when he comes back and notice the gap changes that can be missed when you live day to day with someone. To see him after he’s been out on his own long enough to have had time to reflect back. He’s ready to go, eager to see the next things, be on his own, test his responsibility. Flap the wings, as it were. 

I love you, Tory. You’ll do great. And I’ll always be here for you.